posted by ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
laramie at 11:16pm on 25/06/2007
laramie at 11:16pm on 25/06/2007The word, ‘I’ is meant to represent a person in toto, but in practice it only represents a person to the extent that the person is aware of and accepts him or herself. That is to say, in practice it only represents who we think we are. And we aren’t necessarily who we think we are.
Every example of obsessive behavior, or of inner conflict is evidence that we aren’t who we think we are. There’s more going on in our psyches than we can be aware of, and more than most of us are apt to accept.
We tend to disavow aspects of our psyches that don’t fit our ideas of who we should be. For example, many women are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit our cultural ideals of femininity, many men are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit the cognate ideals of masculinity. Many religious people of whatever variety are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit the ideal of their beliefs. People who take pride in their intellect may disavow the emotional/sensual aspects of our natures. Et cetera.
What is disavowed is still present and active in the psyche. At times I find myself mightily confused because ‘I’ am spending hours playing computer games when ‘I’ really want to be doing a dozen other things. Or I find myself similarly confounded because ‘I’ am eating when ‘I’ am not hungry, or ‘I’ am too caught up in some activity to stir myself when ‘I’ want to get outdoors and play. Similarly someone might find himself smoking when he wants to quit, or doing or failing to do something else contrary to what he believes he desires.
Certainly my understanding of who I am is lacking if I, desiring to play, am not part of the conception of my self in which I am eager to work, and vice-versa.
The problem is not one of self discipline but of self definition. The solution is to get real.
There are many ways to get real. Personally, I use a number of them. I practice meditations, which focus my awareness serially in chakras which represent various essential aspects of our beings.
I practice yoga, which is designed to ‘yoke’ mind to body, balancing ones awareness of both these aspects of being. I walk. I would love to dance more than I do. Exercise in general is a good thing for assuring that one’s sense of identity includes every part of the psyche that is involved in working with and coordinating the body.
I sing, and can hear in my voice the state of my feelings, and whether some part of my voice is weak or under-represented. When singing I think of it in terms of ‘soul,’ that my soul is the sum of feeling/emotional awareness that is represented in my voice.
I have used writing (poetry, journaling and fiction) to enhance my understanding of identity. I’ve used artwork, and worked with a project of the Mental Health Association, called The 26th Street Project, using visual arts to help adults with emotional disabilities to express themselves and to recognize themselves in that expression.
Ideally, religion can help us to get real. Not every religion is suited to every person for this purpose. For instance, a person whose identity is entrenched in his verbal, abstract abilities could benefit by practicing some religion that honors more sensory and nature-oriented perceptions (Hinduism, Wicca, etc.) Someone whose identity is bound up in pragmatic, economic materialism could benefit by practicing what is preached in Judaism, Christianity and Islam.
The idea here is that religions honor a greater truth, although each religion can be as limited in its take on that truth as each individual is in his or her conception of identity. Still, religious communities remind us that, as individuals, we exist in a wider context, of social communities, as well as in the world and wide universe. Our identities include our roles as members of families, trade groups, interest groups, cities, countries and the world wide community of human beings, the Gaean community of living beings, and perhaps an even wider community of beings who may exist beyond this planet. Someone who feels isolated and lonely can benefit by recognizing the senses in which he or she is connected to others in all these ways.
I use every tool I can find because, frankly, my head is a mess. I was dropped on my nose as an infant. The trauma cut me off from awareness of my olfactory sense, and that sense is vital to many basic functions such as eating and mating. I use every tool I can find to help me connect with myself, to reintegrate my sense of identity so that I can function as a whole person, both for my own benefit, and for the sake of participating amicably in my larger communities.
Every example of obsessive behavior, or of inner conflict is evidence that we aren’t who we think we are. There’s more going on in our psyches than we can be aware of, and more than most of us are apt to accept.
We tend to disavow aspects of our psyches that don’t fit our ideas of who we should be. For example, many women are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit our cultural ideals of femininity, many men are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit the cognate ideals of masculinity. Many religious people of whatever variety are apt to disavow qualities that don’t fit the ideal of their beliefs. People who take pride in their intellect may disavow the emotional/sensual aspects of our natures. Et cetera.
What is disavowed is still present and active in the psyche. At times I find myself mightily confused because ‘I’ am spending hours playing computer games when ‘I’ really want to be doing a dozen other things. Or I find myself similarly confounded because ‘I’ am eating when ‘I’ am not hungry, or ‘I’ am too caught up in some activity to stir myself when ‘I’ want to get outdoors and play. Similarly someone might find himself smoking when he wants to quit, or doing or failing to do something else contrary to what he believes he desires.
Certainly my understanding of who I am is lacking if I, desiring to play, am not part of the conception of my self in which I am eager to work, and vice-versa.
The problem is not one of self discipline but of self definition. The solution is to get real.
There are many ways to get real. Personally, I use a number of them. I practice meditations, which focus my awareness serially in chakras which represent various essential aspects of our beings.
I practice yoga, which is designed to ‘yoke’ mind to body, balancing ones awareness of both these aspects of being. I walk. I would love to dance more than I do. Exercise in general is a good thing for assuring that one’s sense of identity includes every part of the psyche that is involved in working with and coordinating the body.
I sing, and can hear in my voice the state of my feelings, and whether some part of my voice is weak or under-represented. When singing I think of it in terms of ‘soul,’ that my soul is the sum of feeling/emotional awareness that is represented in my voice.
I have used writing (poetry, journaling and fiction) to enhance my understanding of identity. I’ve used artwork, and worked with a project of the Mental Health Association, called The 26th Street Project, using visual arts to help adults with emotional disabilities to express themselves and to recognize themselves in that expression.
Ideally, religion can help us to get real. Not every religion is suited to every person for this purpose. For instance, a person whose identity is entrenched in his verbal, abstract abilities could benefit by practicing some religion that honors more sensory and nature-oriented perceptions (Hinduism, Wicca, etc.) Someone whose identity is bound up in pragmatic, economic materialism could benefit by practicing what is preached in Judaism, Christianity and Islam.
The idea here is that religions honor a greater truth, although each religion can be as limited in its take on that truth as each individual is in his or her conception of identity. Still, religious communities remind us that, as individuals, we exist in a wider context, of social communities, as well as in the world and wide universe. Our identities include our roles as members of families, trade groups, interest groups, cities, countries and the world wide community of human beings, the Gaean community of living beings, and perhaps an even wider community of beings who may exist beyond this planet. Someone who feels isolated and lonely can benefit by recognizing the senses in which he or she is connected to others in all these ways.
I use every tool I can find because, frankly, my head is a mess. I was dropped on my nose as an infant. The trauma cut me off from awareness of my olfactory sense, and that sense is vital to many basic functions such as eating and mating. I use every tool I can find to help me connect with myself, to reintegrate my sense of identity so that I can function as a whole person, both for my own benefit, and for the sake of participating amicably in my larger communities.
(no subject)
(no subject)